While we’re at it, tell me why poor William was evicted from the BP on the episode aired 8/29/11 and what’s with Blake being the source of all the female ire in the pad?
But let’s slow it down a bit and get an update on events in the BP, including Jake’s eviction and the famous “kissing contest.”
Jake, once BP resident Vienna’s infamous ex, was evicted by a plurality of the votes in the pad though Jake made a mighty effort to get Vienna’s current boyfriend, Kasey, booted out.
The weekly challenge was a most interesting one but first, allow me to nominate The Bachelor Pad as one of the most provocative prime-time shows on television. One reason I’d offer is this absurd kissing contest but I’ve got another big reason, later.
The concept of the kissing challenge is for each female contender to kiss all the blindfolded male contenders and the reverse, males kiss the females. Each contender then votes for the best kisser of all he or she kissed. Understand that this is a challenge that gives a “safety” rose to each male and female winner that they cannot be eliminated at that week’s rose ceremony, plus the challenge winner gets to go on a romantic and dreamy outing with the BP resident(s) of their choice. Thus all contenders with an impetus to win the grand prize of a quarter of a million dollars want to get the title of best kisser.
The kisses are really not the sort of things that should be filmed up close at the 8pm television hour and yes, I could switch the channel for my dismay. In my home I am the only person watching this show but I’m thinking there are youngsters out there watching along with mesmerized mothers and, well I’d for sure switch the channel if my 7-yr old granddaughter were joining me for the viewing.
It’s supposed to be risqué, I understand this. And the whole exercise is not without a bit of muse in that there are couples aligned and in love, or heading that way, in the BP, and it’s a bit difficult to watch the love of your life passionately kiss another for want of a win. Still, that’s what the show is about, the entrants know this. The spectacle and drama of the kissing challenge is mostly for the entertainment of us viewers and I was entertained if in a rather strange fashion.
The best male kisser was determined, by female vote, to be contender Blake. Goodness, Blake is certainly a fellow constantly in trouble with the females in the Pad.
Now Blake is a handsome fellow. He’s also a personable sort, hardly the shallow Don Juan the other BP females paint him as. A major part of Blake’s problem, WAS, I say “was” as she is no longer a problem, the volatile Melissa, may God Bless.
I can’t imagine anyone with such a volcanic emotional makeup as Melissa anywhere in my surround. By me, Blake never promised Melissa anything save a passing suggestion that he and Melissa pair up to avoid eviction. Melissa then felt like she owned Blake and since Blake won the kissing contest Melissa felt he should choose her, but of course, for the other half of the date Blake won for his ability to smooch.
The entire show had Melissa going ballistic over Blake’s "betrayal" and now we must deal with the big question of the day. For who did Blake chose as his date partner, but HOLLY!
Now we have another set of fireworks going off in the BP as Holly’s former fiancé is co-contender Michael. So there’s the angry Melissa and the morose Michael stirring things in the Pad. There was also the very happy Blake and Holly who went on a ski trip and, according to script, were gone together for a full 24 hours.
Which is why I asked in the title line just what the heck happened between Michael and Holly? I know they had been engaged and I know they broke up. I’ve been watching the Bachelor Pad from the beginning and there’s barely been an episode where these two aren’t crying and hugging and expressing renewed love but still this viewer has no idea why they ever broke up.
At least Jake accused Vienna of cheating on him and Vienna accused Jake of being mean and nasty. A viewer watching the very sweet Holly and the gentle Michael has been given no clue whatever went wrong between them.
At times Holly said Michael left her and at times Michael says Holly left him. So which is it? More, WHY? Did one of them cheat on the other? Did one have an alcohol or drug problem?
Understand there’s no requirement that Michael and Holly divulge these secrets but I’m thinking I’m not the only BP viewer confused what with all the scripting of the endless saga of Holly and Michael.
William got voted out of the BP from the male side and Melissa got the boot from the female side.
I'll never understood just why William, a contender who’s never really won anything, was such a target, with he and Kasey both being the two up for eviction as seemed to be the popular consensus. Like its copycatted rival, Big Brother, contenders can vote to evict pretty much whoever they want.
As strategy would have it, there’s some sense in honing in on a dangerous co-contender. Thus I understand Kasey as a target, but William? Why not Michael, who’s disrupting things with his constant angst over Holly and who’s also won a few prior challenges? Why not Blake for that matter, who got Melissa so riled and shamelessly chose Holly as his date despite knowing that there was still “something” between Holly and Michael?
Finally, about the x-rated stuff on this show, it took me almost an hour to get my jaw off of the floor when Kasey asserted that he was so scared of the fiery Melissa that he feared she would “cut my nuts off.” I am NOT making this up! Was this some kind of weird dialogue malfunction? Because there was no bleep folks, we all got ears out here in la-la land.
Of course Kasey’s fear of castration by Melissa wasn’t unwarranted but I’m not convinced his assertion was the stuff to pass FCC scrutiny.
The Bachelor Pad airs on Monday nights, ABC, at 8p/7c. Keep tuning in to my column here on The Morton Report because we’ve got snark, speculation and scrutiny aplenty after each episode.