The Movie Spew: Ridley Scott to Make a New Blade Runner Movie

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Ridley Scott to Direct Blade Runner 2, Possibly the Least Likely Sequel Ever Made

Everybody knew that Ridley Scott loves Blade Runner based purely on the fact that he kept re-editing and tinkering with the movie decades after it was released.

The initial box office bomb is now considered a classic and apparently it’s no longer just Scott who thinks that it’s his finest hour as a filmmaker. Today Scott proved that he still loves Blade Runner more than anyone could have guessed by signing on to direct a new Blade Runner movie almost 30 years after he sent the original out to theaters.

It’s unclear exactly what Scott’s plans are at the moment. A sequel seems unlikely since the entire cast is now ready for retirement and replicants aren’t supposed to age. There’s no way that Scott would agree to a remake either, so the best bet is for either a prequel about the origins of the replicant program or an unrelated story set in the same universe.

Both sound like a definite possibility given that Scott is currently putting the finishing touches on a new sci-fi opus called Prometheus, which was initially conceived of as a prequel to the director’s iconic Alien, but has since transformed into something only tangentially related to the series. It’s a little odd that Ridley Scott has experienced some sort of late career crisis that’s caused him to return to his earliest, finest, and most successful movies.

Still, at the very least it will be interesting to see if Scott can top the remarkable special effects in the Blade Runner with all of the new technology currently at his disposal. All you die hard Blade Runner fans out there shouting “blasphemy” right now should keep in mind that things could be far worse. Scott could be planning a sequel to Thelma And Louise. Now that would be justifiable cause for widespread fear and panic.

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Jim Carrey and Amy Adams to Lend Their Voices to an Unnecessary Popeye Movie

Today’s thoroughly unnecessary movie announcement comes in the form of an all new animated Popeye feature film, because everyone knows how much the kids today love movies based on cartoons and comic strips that haven’t been relevant for years.

The animated film had been in development for a little while, but is pretty well guaranteed to be made now that it’s been announced that Jim Carrey will be voicing Popeye while Amy Adams will be taking on Olive Oyl.

It’s hard to imagine this movie coming close matching the groundbreaking Fleischer Studios cartoons or the batshit insane Robert Altman feature starring Robin Williams and Shelly Duvall. Still, something about seeing Popeye’s bulging forearms flying at freaked out children in 3D seems perversely right, even if the the film and the casting feels oh-so-wrong.

We’ll have to wait and see how this turns out I suppose…though I predict disaster in a big bad way.

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Spy Kids Will Officially Smell Like Poo

Finally, if you’re planning on going to see Spy Kids 4 over the weekend, you should be prepared to snort up big heavy whiffs of poo in the process. That’s not me making a judgment call on the movie (though the fact that it won’t be screening for critics definitely isn’t a good sign), it’s a simple fact.

You see, writer/director Robert Rodriguez decided to bring back smell-o-vision for his latest Spy Kids movie (aka scatch n’ sniff cards handed out with every ticket) and one of them will smell like a dirty diaper.

Rodriguez recently told The Huffington Post, “Originally, we didn't have any really rancid smells, but kids wanted something really stinky in there. It really doesn't smell that bad. No one's going to get sick in the theater." Well, they won’t get sick from the fake smells anyways. However, it’s difficult to say whether or not audiences will be forced to vomit by the movie itself. Check in on Monday to find out.

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Phil Brown was born years ago. He then grew up, went to university, and now reviews movies, interviews people and writes comedy. He writes for a number of websites and publications including the one you are currently reading. Phil can be found haunting movie theatres around Toronto. He isn't dangerous,…

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