I remember feeling like the most superficial bee-otch when my (now) husband and I started talking about getting engaged. I wanted a ring that would not only represent our relationship, but also represent me. "I'm going to wear this ring every day for the rest of my life, so I want to love it. I'm not going to love it just 'cause you picked it out. I wish that were the case, but I'm not gonna lie" - Me.
See, told you: bee-otch.
But, I'm not alone...
I distinctively remember the Sex and The City episode where Carrie accidentally finds an engagement ring in her boyfriend Aidan's stuff and realizes he's apparently about to propose to her with it. She freaks. But not because she can't believe he's planning to propose. She freaks because the ring is so not her.
And this, of course, would lead any modern woman to then wonder... does he know me at all? Is he even the right guy?
The personal choice of an engagement ring is an idea with which I totally resonate, which is why this whole Kate Middleton ring copy knock-off thing is so insane to me.
So here's the scoop, just so we're all caught up: Kate Middleton (Prince Will's fiancée) is sporting the same ring given to Princess Diana from Prince Charles. So emotional, so personal, and so totally gorgeous. 4 diamonds encircling a sapphire, it's beautiful, no doubt.
People are obsessed with it. Ob.Sessed. They want to copy it, wear it, have it, flaunt it, play
dress up with it. There are more knock-offs of that ring online that there are
stories about Charlie Sheen. Well, I'm not sure about that, but there are a lot.
The whole thing is fascinating to me because the ring
represents their family, their legacy, their history, their
relationship. Not anyone else's. Why would you want a low-rent copy of a
well-known and impersonal ring? You think we won't know yours is fake? Baby please.
The last time I wanted to be exactly like someone else was when I was 12 and my identity was fully based in the fact that Nicki, Marni, Jessica and I all had the same jean jacket. It helped me remain totally unconfused as to where I belonged, who I was with, and what I was all about. Kinda' like a Pink Lady.
But I wonder, as an adult, if you want the same engagement ring as Kate Middleton, what are you really saying? Is it as simple as "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery," or is it more than that? Are you saying "I want to be a Princess, and this is the closest I'll ever get, so give me that 'Oval Faceted faux Ceylon Sapphire ring for $19.90 plus $6.99 shipping and handling'... like now"?
It's not that it's a bad thing to copy and wear the same ring as someone else, it just throws the idea that an engagement ring is a material-representation-of-your-own-personal-relationship a bit off. It makes it mean something different, like, this ring represents what I want my relationship to remind me of, not what it actually is.
That all being said, I do get the whole wanting to be a princess deal. I'm an American woman, I'm with you. But a hybrid of cubic zirconium and trying to feel as much like someone else as possible doesn't really scream Princess to me.
...I think it's actually the tiara that does the trick.
Not to worry, Kate's tiara will be revealed as she walks down the aisle this week. Knock-offs will be made available faster than a World Cup t-shirt, so we're good to go. But being in love with your own life and proud to flaunt your own romance? That's sold separately darlings. Completely separately.