Stump the Rock Star, Then Tea in the Park with Yoko

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Stump the rock star?

You find yourself at a loss for words in an interview. Well, there's an app for it. Kind of. The geniuses at the Arty Bollocks Generator are there to bail you out. Head over to their website and you'll never feel flummoxed by the relentless interrogators at Spin, Pitchfork or The Morton Report. Click on the friendly grey button and out comes: "My work explores the relationship between postmodern discourse and emotional memories. With influences as diverse as Nietzsche and John Lennon, new combinations are created from both traditional and modern layers."

That doesn't work for you, you can go again, and click another button that says "Not Arty Enough." Or you could just steal some of Yoko Ono's tweets. Speaking of which, the always-inscrutable one was endearingly prosaic today when she tweeted: "John used to say 'I love you' every day. I didn't understand then, how lucky I was."

You can tell her exactly how lucky she was on Tuesday in Central Park, where Ono will be reprising her "Silent Piece," a mediation she wrote in 1953. Go to Imagine Peace for more information. In the meantime set your alarm for dawn if you plan to attend.

Celebrate the summer solstice with Yoko Ono's meditative Secret Piece, at sunrise in Central Park. We will meet at Columbus Circle starting at 5AM. Bring any musical instrument or just your voice, and we will send you to a secluded part of the park to play the note of your choice to the accompaniment of birds. At 8AM we will all return to Columbus Circle for hot green tea.

Who: You and Yoko... and whoever else shows up
What: "Silent Piece"
Where: Central Park, New York City
When: June 21, 2011, 5AM - 8AM
Why: if you have to ask you'll never know...

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Jaan Uhelszki was one of the founding editors at Detroit’s legendary Creem magazine. Since that time, her work has appeared in USA Today, Uncut, Rolling Stone, Spin, NME, Relix, and Guitar World. She is the only journalist to have ever performed in full makeup with Kiss. Luckily she only had to put…

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